I’m fascinated by my personal growth process.
I’ve gone through ups and downs, had months in which I felt tremendously strong and stable, and days and weeks when I felt like I don’t know who I am anymore.
It’s easy to give up and say “This is who I am. I’m probably never going to change.”
The hard part comes when I say “I need to move forward, I need to trust myself that I can be better.”
People who are constantly developing aren’t all sunshine and roses. They don’t believe that they are awesome and that they go from good to great. On the contrary – many are tormented by self-doubt and fears. I am one of those, the one that has to find the spark in the middle of the chaos, the one who feels is walking a thin line and might fall any day.
However, I trust the process. And it’s my job to get up every day and strive to get better, to conquer these doubts.
As part of my work, I work with exceptionally talented people, with high potentials, with freshly promoted managers and with people in accelerated development programs. I give feedback to 360 degrees processes, I coach them on personal learning and self development.
And it doesn’t matter what function they are in or what managerial level they have. It’s always about the same things: ego, fear of being misunderstood, anger at not being listened to, need for power (ego again), need for recognition. It’s always about how we are seen, as human beings, and about how well we stand on our own two feet in order not to need confirmations.
Whenever we open up to the real process of change, there’s a deep fear of being stripped bare in front of others. It’s always easier to say “Well this is who I am, change doesn’t work for me”, because, who knows what others might think if you fail.
Nobody cares anyway.
On the contrary – if you state that you’re aware of your shortcomings, and ask others to help or guide you in working on them, they might actually be impressed. They might actually admire your hard work. They might envy you and hope you’ll fail, so that they say “Well she never made it anyway. I’m glad I never tried and saved myself the effort.”
You might fall down. We all do.
But every time you fall down, you get a little bit stronger. You know where you failed and know what to do different next time. The strength lies in getting up and going further.
The hardest part is not giving up. The hardest part is continuing on the path.
Trust the process. It will get you on the other side.
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.