As I’m writing this, I’m in a sun lit room, in a wonderful cafe (I know, the dream of writing your own blog posts on a quiet morning in a cafe ) and the song playing in the background is “Morcheeba – Enjoy the ride”.
Might as well.
This year has been full of bumps and turns, more on the inside than on the outside.
And I haven’t written much because, well, this was supposed to be a blog about time management and tools for life, and I didn’t feel particularly able to share my skills in a field where I felt completely defeated and overwhelmed.
This bumpy ride taught me more about myself than I could have hoped.
I will try to do it all, and it’s completely unreasonable.
Then I will feel overwhelmed by trying to do it all, and I will start making mistakes.
I will quietly hope that no one notices them too much, or at least that they don’t judge me for it. Obviously, someone will point one mistake out just as I am at the edge of panic, balancing several imaginary plates on the top of my head.
My body will start giving me signals, and I will start extinguishing them like small fires, obviously ignoring the fact that they’re psychosomatic reflections.
Things will get worse and eventually I will either (a) collapse or (b) get a grip on things and make a change.
Ironically enough, the above happened to me twice this year.
Talk about lessons learned, right?
Anyway, what I do want to say is that I’m only human. I tried to do too many things, and somehow, this blog wasn’t on the priority list.
But now, I need a place to record this journey, a place where I can share what happens, what I learn, my small-ish a-ha moments and connected dots on the larger map.
This bumpy ride continues, but somehow, I started to look around and pay attention to myself in the whole process.
I noticed that my own state of mind influences things much more than a well organized to do list.
So I’m working on that now – how I can influence my own lens on the world, and how I can shine my own light as much as I can.
I can only hope that it strikes a chord, somewhere, even if in the smallest amount.