When NOT getting what you wanted became the next best thing

The way this blog started to exist was from deep unhappiness.

In 2009, I had, after long attempts to score a much desired job, received an assignment that to me seemed difficult, unrewarding and so much different than what I was built for. Compensation & Benefits was an area that didn’t interest me, that I found annoyingly mathematic, especially for me, a poetic HR that dreamed to do nothing but talk to people and coach them into happiness at their jobs.

So, in order to kill my own unhappiness, I looked for something I really loved, and brought that into my spare time. I enrolled in a coaching school, started to blog and started to coach.

For me, there are two learnings out of this situation:

1. In an unhappy situation, I turn to discover new things that make me happy, outside, and try to bring them into my life.

2. Usually when I’m unhappy, there’s something to learn there, and I should stick around through the unhappiness.


Why NOT getting what you wanted is ok:

1. Not getting it builds a tension. Tension is fuel for change. 

Whenever you find yourself faced with tension in your life, ask yourself what’s behind it.

If you’re unable to get along with someone, what is it you need to change? What’s there to learn?

2. Look at roadblocks as signs. You may either have to dig your way through them, or you may have to turn around and find another way. 

Either option makes you stronger. Just don’t sit in front of them whining.

3. Learn about who you really are. 

When we’re faced with difficulties we learn more about ourselves – we usually turn to what gives us strength from within.
For me, it was exploring my career dream back then.

Later this year, I started sewing and making clothes from the same need. While reading “The Happiness Project“, I asked myself what was really making me happy as a child – and remembered my dream to be a fashion designer. So I bought a sewing machine, enrolled in a course, and now have way less spare time, because of my sewing obsession :) .


When faced with a bend in the road, we’re all helpless and it’s easy to give in to despair. But sometimes, if your goals don’t fulfill, you end up doing even more.



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1 Comment
  • travel
    November 9, 2012

    think that is the best article thet i have read

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